Helping Your Daughter Understand Teasing: A Parent’s Role

As parents, we all want our daughters to grow up feeling confident and respected. But teasing whether from friends, classmates, or even adults can sometimes shake that confidence. While some teasing is playful, it can easily become hurtful or inappropriate.

Teasing is a part of childhood, but not all of it is harmless. It’s essential to start talking to your daughter about teasing at a young age. Ask her if she’s ever been teased, how it made her feel, and whether she’s seen it happen to others. The goal is to help her recognise when teasing is playful and when it becomes a problem.

Not all teasing is bad—friends often tease each other in a fun way. But it becomes harmful when:

• It makes someone feel embarrassed, scared, or upset.

• It’s about something personal, like looks, weight, or intelligence.

• It keeps happening even after asking the person to stop.

Explain to your daughter that good teasing should make both people laugh, not just one. If it feels mean or makes her uncomfortable, it’s not okay.

Many children don’t speak up about teasing because they fear making a big deal out of it. Teach your daughter simple, confident ways to respond, such as:

• “That’s not funny to me.”

• “I don’t like that. Please stop.”

• Walking away and ignoring the teaser.

If the teasing continues, she should feel comfortable telling a teacher, a trusted adult, or you. Let her know that asking for help isn’t being weak, it’s about standing up for herself.

Sometimes, people dismiss teasing by saying things like, “They’re just joking” or “Don’t take it seriously.” But if something hurts, it matters. Make sure your daughter knows that her feelings are valid and she has the right to set boundaries.

Teasing becomes bullying when it’s repetitive, intentional, and meant to hurt. Teach your daughter that if someone is constantly teasing her in a mean way, it’s okay to call it out and ask for help.

A good rule of thumb: if it makes her feel small, embarrassed, or scared, it’s no longer just teasing.

If your daughter sees someone else being teased, she can make a big difference. Encourage her to:

• Stand up for the person if she feels safe doing so.

• Change the subject to shift attention away from the teasing.

• Tell a trusted adult if it keeps happening.

Helping others stand up to teasing teaches empathy and confidence.

Children learn from what they see. Be mindful of how teasing happens within the family. Light teasing is normal, but if it starts to hurt feelings, it’s important to address it. Model how to set boundaries by saying things like, “I know you’re joking, but that actually hurt my feelings.”

A confident child is less likely to be affected by teasing. Encourage activities that make your daughter feel strong and capable, whether it’s sports, arts, or simply standing tall and speaking up for herself. The more she believes in herself, the less power teasing will have over her.

One talk isn’t enough. As your daughter grows, she will encounter different social situations. Check in regularly, ask if she’s facing any teasing, and remind her that she can always talk to you.

Teasing is a part of life, but with the proper guidance, your daughter can learn to handle it with confidence. By teaching her how to recognise, respond to, and stand up against hurtful teasing, you’re giving her the tools to navigate the world with strength and self-respect.

Keep the conversation open, be her safe space, and remind her that she is never alone in this.